Day 16: Yes, I Can


I did not get to this last night after my training session with the Sadist, and our leg day. Yes, even knowing that I had legs to look forward to (or dread?) I still willingly drove myself to the gym. You see, for whatever reason, the last couple of days I have been listening to the negative voice in my head, the one that has always come through and convinced me that whatever I am doing is stupid. I should quit. I can’t do it. I am tired of all the reasons why I can’t and don’t. I am ready to prove to myself that I can.

I was already feeling, well, puny is the word I like to choose. I was not running at my full potential yesterday. I have my theories on the reason for this, and all of them are quite viable. Tuesday afternoon we kicked my butt doing arms tri-sets, with cardio thrown in, plus my 2 mile walk -jog afterwards. I know that when I got home that evening I did not eat dinner like I should have, I did not restore nutrients, nor did I eat the proteins needed for my muscle rebuild. Yesterday morning I failed to eat breakfast. I woke in a mood and I knew that if I ate, I would dive straight into the comfort /emergency chocolate that I have in my pantry, so I put off eating for over 7 hours after I woke. I double whammied myself with poor choices and when it was time to work the legs, the energy was gone. I did the session, as best as I could, but I was far from my full potential. I left disappointed in myself.

After my lack-luster workout I came home, guzzled more water and made certain that I had a proper dinner with red meat, the protein that my body was starved for. I am so glad that I listened to my body last night and made amends to myself.

This morning was another challenging morning, more because of a restless night sleep filled with tossing and turning, so when I woke, I had the age old internal debate with my motivation. The argument I had with myself was not nice, but sometimes that is the only way I can get through to myself. Yes, I rolled out of bed, I fixed myself a single cup of coffee, jumped into the shower (I looked like a short haired Medusa this morning! Frightful!), got dressed, grabbed my water bottle, a string cheese, and an apple, and set off. Yes, I was back at the gym this morning walking the treadmill to keep my metabolism running. After my hour plus, I am home, showered, drinking my protein shake, and getting ready for work.

You see, today I fought another battle, I slayed another dragon. I became just a little bit stronger.

2 thoughts on “Day 16: Yes, I Can

  1. I was worried about you when I heard you hadn’t eaten the other day. That is a bad old pattern. You need the meals to power your increased activity. Glad your day ended on a better note. Remember fewer bad choices and more good choices leads to more success.

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